(adjective) a word indicating that the referenced work or analysis is thorough or complete, perhaps by allusion to food that is fully prepared, as in, “You should hold off on releasing those projections until Brad has a chance to weigh in, we want them to be crisp”; usually employed in the context of preparing something for release to a broader audience or to more senior levels of the organization where greater scrutiny is expected; it is duly noted that crisp objects, while ostensibly finished, are also far more brittle and prone to shattering
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watch-out
Posted on January 2, 2019
(noun) a thing to, well, watch out for, as in “Are there any major watch-outs as we execute this plan?”; this catchall term refers to risks, obstacles, deficiencies, competitive threats, etc., but avoids referencing anything negative directly, favoring a more cutesy approach; creation of this jargon follows a common pattern in the business world in which verbs are converted into nouns1 (cf. the ask, the solve, value-add), generating a stock of trite phrases that start to comprise their own parallel mode of communication, one that is difficult to comprehend for those not immersed in the social dialect of the users
- In broader English this shifting of words between lexical categories is as old as the language itself, though it more often involves changing nouns to verbs. Business jargon seems to tilt in the opposite direction, away from direct use of action words, which may contribute to jargon’s reputation as being obfuscatory rather than helpful. ↩
eat-your-greens
Posted on December 26, 2018
(adj.) a task or assignment that will be unglamorous and tedious but should nonetheless provide valuable development for the future, as in: “I know that counting transformers on light poles in Siberia doesn’t excite you, but this is really an eat-your-greens project”; can be used in educational or training contexts to refer to unexciting yet necessary course content; derives from the nutritious leafy vegetables that are commonly regarded as unappetizing yet provide significant value to a diet; var. eat-your-spinach
development opportunity
Posted on December 19, 2018
a weakness, flaw, or shortcoming that should be rectified, usually by the subsequent suggestion; in strongly feedback-oriented cultures these can be highlighted with some regularity, so using this term shifts the focus away from failures and onto ways that an individual can grow, avoiding the perception of pervasive negativity; can also refer to a task that falls well outside the purview of an individual and which brings very little benefit that is nevertheless foisted on him or her, as in “Hey Jane, why don’t you go ahead and take care of snack arrangements for the next update meeting, it will be a good development opportunity for you”; alternatively, can refer to a new job that intentionally outmatches someone’s expertise or capabilities, such that he or she is forced to acquire new skills quickly or risk flaming out
calibrate
Posted on December 12, 2018
to ensure that numbers or facts are in agreement; clashes with the actual definition of the word, which is to determine or standardize the gradations of a measuring instrument according to a known benchmark, thus ensuring conformity to some objective standard; can be used in scenarios in which someone wishes to sound technical, as in “Just make sure your logistics data calibrates with the recommendations from the last executive presentation”
rock star
Posted on December 5, 2018
an individual whose performance in a given area or success at specific endeavors is highly impressive, unique and/or admirable; this appellation is generally used sparingly, although the term is sometimes used frivolously to express purportedly extreme gratitude, as in: “Thanks for picking up my mail for me, you’re a rock star”; persons so designated are expected to have markedly different career trajectories in relation to their peers, although, as with many in the field of music from which the term derives, they may similarly end up flaming out in ruinous ways
punt
Posted on November 28, 2018
to extricate one’s self from a difficult situation by essentially avoiding the conflict altogether; derives from the play in American football in which the offensive side opts to forego a final attempt at advancing the ball in favor of giving possession over to the defending team via a booming kick, resulting in a less favorable field position for the opponent; the word can be used when someone deflects a thorny or importunate question, or when they simply lack the time or resources to address a concern at the moment; commonly employed to describe the actions of another but infrequently used by the person doing the punting, due to negative or cowardly connotations
check the box
Posted on November 20, 2018
to perfunctorily assure completion of a task, suggesting that the substance of the activity is less important than the impression it gives to others, as in “Just make sure you check the box on the fourth quarter analysis before you send the report”; alternatively this metaphorical phrase can refer to the need to validate that all elements have been covered, ensuring no smaller details have been forgotten; related to the pejorative term box-checking exercise, used to describe bureaucratic or oppressive work
radio silence
Posted on November 14, 2018
a term used to describe the situation in which an individual is completely unresponsive to repeated electronic contacts (e.g., e-mails, telephone calls), as in, “I sent Janice two emails and a text yesterday but it’s just been radio silence from her”; derives from the military or maritime practice of stopping all radio communications for a set time, for instance to maintain operational secrecy; evokes the feeling of vague unease or dread that occurs in aviation when an airborne craft is incommunicado; this condition leads those who are attempting contact to speculate as to the cause of the subject’s inability or unwillingness to respond; in recent years this phenomenon is disappearing, as the prevalence of always-connected, omnipresent electronic devices makes it very difficult for anyone to be totally out of reach; can also refer to someone whose public communications (e.g., social media) have become dormant, usually for an unknown reason
Dashboard lights, soccer jerseys, and the value of details
Sweat the small stuff
Posted on November 7, 2018
Buckle up
By 1974 the U.S. National Highway Traffic Safety Administration had long known that seat belts were one of the best tools to reduce injuries in automobile accidents, yet many Americans still failed to consistently buckle up when they drove. To nudge these drivers to be more conscientious the agency mandated that all new cars provide both audible and visual warnings to anyone with the temerity to drive off with an unfastened seat belt.1 Automobile manufacturers were given some latitude as to how to implement these alerts, leading to a profusion of buzzers, beeps, and chimes, until most settled on an intermittent tone, accompanied by the now-standard red icon of a belted human blinking on the dashboard.
The majority of companies designed these two indicators to run independently and left it at that, having satisfied the letter of the regulation. But a select few realized that aligning the reminders could help reinforce the message while adding a bit of polish to a prosaic feature. They made the effort to ensure that the warning light flashed in perfect synchronization with the tone. Although seemingly trivial, beneath the surface this signified a great deal. Read more…
- This feature is still too paternalistic for many drivers, leading to a cottage industry of tinkerers figuring out ways to disable it. ↩
- And you, dear reader, are probably one of them. Validate this for yourself the next time you start your car. More likely than not you’ll find the tone and warning light aren’t aligned with each other. ↩
- For the privilege of doing so Nike also paid the club £20 million. That could be considered a steal, considering that Adidas is now paying £75 million annually. ↩
- It seems to have worked out well enough, with Man U winning the Premier League and coming in runner-up in the Champions League in the 2010-11 season, its first with the new uniform. Future iterations of the jersey replaced “believe” with “relentless” and later printed the entire phrase “Forged in Industry, Striving for Glory” inside the neckline, which is a mouthful but calls back to Manchester’s industrial heritage. ↩
- As an investment thesis, these details could also be a way to identify outperformers, if you have the stomach for it. For what it’s worth Nike stock has trounced the broader market since 2010, though beware of anecdata. ↩
- The reverse is unfortunately also true, where shoddy details are signs of deeper issues within. See: Sears, Post Office, U.S., et al. ↩
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