this rare specimen (only two reported usages in the wild) means to convene together to agree on a plan of action; evokes the practice of a huddling sports team forming a circle, with each member placing one hand in the center, as it prepares for an important game or decides on a specific play; the leader or captain’s hand is usually the first in the stack, with all others placed on top of it one-by-one; in this manner each person signals their alignment with and commitment to the agreed approach; this phrase may be followed by the object of discussion, as in: “Let’s stack our hands around the new Middle East strategy”
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put a stake in the ground
Posted on January 22, 2019
to assert a point of view or take decisive action at a relatively early stage, where much remains unknown but a working hypothesis must be adopted for progress to be made, as in, “I know all the options are risky, but you need to put a stake in the ground for where we invest next”; the phrase may be interjected when a deliberative process has so far yielded waffling or equivocation and a more robust, confident plan is required; derives from the former practice of claiming unsettled territory by driving wooden stakes into the ground, thus marking off the area claimed as one’s own; the one who puts his or her metaphorical stake in the ground is similarly defining a position that will then need to be managed and defended; when used as an imperative this expression can be a roundabout way of telling someone “We don’t have the facts yet, so make a guess by the deadline”
pressure test
Posted on January 16, 2019
to assess the quality of a particular idea or analysis by subjecting it to more intense scrutiny of some sort; derives from engineering, when the structural soundness or seaworthiness of a vessel is determined by applying atmospheric or liquid pressure up to its design limits, at which point poorly-designed objects can fail dramatically; in the business context a pressure test can send metaphorical shards in the direction of the unwary creator of the tested work; similar to stress test; the variant kick the tires has less serious connotations, and suggests a more cursory review
crisp
Posted on January 8, 2019
(adjective) a word indicating that the referenced work or analysis is thorough or complete, perhaps by allusion to food that is fully prepared, as in, “You should hold off on releasing those projections until Brad has a chance to weigh in, we want them to be crisp”; usually employed in the context of preparing something for release to a broader audience or to more senior levels of the organization where greater scrutiny is expected; it is duly noted that crisp objects, while ostensibly finished, are also far more brittle and prone to shattering
watch-out
Posted on January 2, 2019
(noun) a thing to, well, watch out for, as in “Are there any major watch-outs as we execute this plan?”; this catchall term refers to risks, obstacles, deficiencies, competitive threats, etc., but avoids referencing anything negative directly, favoring a more cutesy approach; creation of this jargon follows a common pattern in the business world in which verbs are converted into nouns1 (cf. the ask, the solve, value-add), generating a stock of trite phrases that start to comprise their own parallel mode of communication, one that is difficult to comprehend for those not immersed in the social dialect of the users
- In broader English this shifting of words between lexical categories is as old as the language itself, though it more often involves changing nouns to verbs. Business jargon seems to tilt in the opposite direction, away from direct use of action words, which may contribute to jargon’s reputation as being obfuscatory rather than helpful. ↩
eat-your-greens
Posted on December 26, 2018
(adj.) a task or assignment that will be unglamorous and tedious but should nonetheless provide valuable development for the future, as in: “I know that counting transformers on light poles in Siberia doesn’t excite you, but this is really an eat-your-greens project”; can be used in educational or training contexts to refer to unexciting yet necessary course content; derives from the nutritious leafy vegetables that are commonly regarded as unappetizing yet provide significant value to a diet; var. eat-your-spinach
development opportunity
Posted on December 19, 2018
a weakness, flaw, or shortcoming that should be rectified, usually by the subsequent suggestion; in strongly feedback-oriented cultures these can be highlighted with some regularity, so using this term shifts the focus away from failures and onto ways that an individual can grow, avoiding the perception of pervasive negativity; can also refer to a task that falls well outside the purview of an individual and which brings very little benefit that is nevertheless foisted on him or her, as in “Hey Jane, why don’t you go ahead and take care of snack arrangements for the next update meeting, it will be a good development opportunity for you”; alternatively, can refer to a new job that intentionally outmatches someone’s expertise or capabilities, such that he or she is forced to acquire new skills quickly or risk flaming out
calibrate
Posted on December 12, 2018
to ensure that numbers or facts are in agreement; clashes with the actual definition of the word, which is to determine or standardize the gradations of a measuring instrument according to a known benchmark, thus ensuring conformity to some objective standard; can be used in scenarios in which someone wishes to sound technical, as in “Just make sure your logistics data calibrates with the recommendations from the last executive presentation”
rock star
Posted on December 5, 2018
an individual whose performance in a given area or success at specific endeavors is highly impressive, unique and/or admirable; this appellation is generally used sparingly, although the term is sometimes used frivolously to express purportedly extreme gratitude, as in: “Thanks for picking up my mail for me, you’re a rock star”; persons so designated are expected to have markedly different career trajectories in relation to their peers, although, as with many in the field of music from which the term derives, they may similarly end up flaming out in ruinous ways
punt
Posted on November 28, 2018
to extricate one’s self from a difficult situation by essentially avoiding the conflict altogether; derives from the play in American football in which the offensive side opts to forego a final attempt at advancing the ball in favor of giving possession over to the defending team via a booming kick, resulting in a less favorable field position for the opponent; the word can be used when someone deflects a thorny or importunate question, or when they simply lack the time or resources to address a concern at the moment; commonly employed to describe the actions of another but infrequently used by the person doing the punting, due to negative or cowardly connotations
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